Thursday, March 26, 2009

My Moody Musings



“What is this life if; full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare….”

Wonder all my well-nigh dead living senses in unison! This Davies poem which was once liked by me for its simplicity is now admired for depicting so well the modern life complexity. How can the poem written ages ago hold good even today is one question which left me gaping. But I was in no mood to think more than this. My so called busy life hasn’t given me any chance to be in touch with me for long and now after a long and tiring day at work here I am sitting in my cab waiting to be home and slowly slipping into my moody musings….trying to listen to all that my senses want to share….

My mind which was once calculative, fast and busy cooking some damn thing today has come to a grinding halt. It swiftly questions me “Should I be thinking always??”

My eyes which were ones very excited about dreaming even in sleep, observing people and things around are now innocently asking me “Can we be put to sleep?”

My heart which once beat for all my people, loved to be accompanied with them is now avoiding everyone. It feels bored with people around, feels ditched by the world around….and tells me “I would want to remain inside you…” robbing me of my chance to be an open-hearted gal !

My ears which were once all ears to have the ipod headphones plugged into them are now saying “Pls shut us in a silent world”. To them now a “Mauja hi Mauja”or a “Masakali” or a “Mysterious girl” are all the same – a mere cacophony!

My tongue which was once dying to tickle its taste buds with various tastes is now content with a glass of water ! All it says is “Give me something to live not just to survive..” for which I have no answer !

The creative streak in me which always was upto some blog topic is now drained of ideas and deprived of inspiration !

My musings came to a screeching halt thanks to the traffic and the rash driving, the cab had to stop that way and it was time for me to get down. I walk for a while finally reach home. I open the lock and enter the house only to see darkness. There’s a power cut I tell myself thinking there’s darkness in mind, darkness inside the home darkness everywhere in my life

In the darkness with no energy to even light a candle I fall flat on my couch and continue to get into my dark tunnel of thoughts with half-closed eyes and half-hearted mind. After a few seconds I see a light, a bright light shining in the dark. My reflexes wake up and tell me what it is and I also wake up from my musings like I have woken up from deep sleep!! The moment I realize what it is my tightly clipped lips break into a smile then laugh at my own stupidity and then break into a guffaw !! The red light is the light of the power meter…. I forgot to switch on the light !!!!! Indeed there’s light at the end of a tunnel :-)

The smile has dispelled all my moody musings and de-stressed me. My eyes are now wide-open, my mind plans to blog this, my creative streak says it’s now inspired, my ears say its all ears to hear what it has to say, my heart is jumping with joy to share this with its close people and my hands are all set to type ;-)

My work is waiting for me, my house is in a mess and is crying for my attention but all my senses said “Go on and do what you enjoy doing” otherwise we would again have to feel stressed and say “What is this life if; full of care, we have no time to stand and stare….”